


A Shield, A Weapon

by Davechicken



Series: Kylux - Fluff & Angst [222]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-23
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-10-23 04:02:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10711791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Davechicken/pseuds/Davechicken
Summary: But time is running out.





	A Shield, A Weapon

Hux isn’t prone to paranoia. He isn’t. He’s got a healthy awareness of his own mortality, and the precarious position of being On Top of the particular ladder he’s mounted. 

When you get so high, the only way is down. And the only way down is _all the way down_. Hux has no intention of falling, but he has to be ever-vigilant about those who might clasp at his ankles, ostensibly to stay still.

And yet–

And yet.

The Leader called Kylo in to ‘Complete His Training’. He’d been stuck together with Bacta-glue and all-but dead to the world for weeks.

He never talks about his Training. 

Hux has asked, but never pushed. It’s one of those things you realise is better unspoken. There’s plenty of those in Hux’s life, and he’s not surprised to find them in Kylo’s, either.

And yet…

Kylo doesn’t take painkillers. Hux is not one to criticise, because he doesn’t like the idea of being dependent upon them himself, but there’s a headache, and then there’s a _gash that covers a third of your body almost_ and _a hole big enough to put your fist in_ and maybe those deserve a little medication?

No?

Kylo tries to hide his pain, sitting upright, or walking with a gait that’s _slightly too precise and regular_. He’s hiding the limp, and he’s covering over how he guards his torso, his shoulder, his arm. He’s in pain, and he thinks he should be.

(Hux wishes he didn’t understand that masochistic streak. _I failed, therefore it’s right that I hurt._ )

The ways of the Force are beyond his comprehension, or anyone’s willingness to share, so he is stuck watching the shadows deepen when the mask comes off. He’s stuck knowing there’s things he’ll _never_ be able to understand. He’s left standing outside the door, dismissed, waiting to see how long the Leader will keep Kylo today. Wondering if they know he’s outside. Wondering if they care.

_How did it all go so wrong? How was he so foolish, so careless? Did he learn nothing from the annals of the Empire? Why was he so cocksure and simple-minded?_

Dark figures loom the corridors, and Hux feels his skin go cold. The heat is sucked from the room, and no amount of layers can help when the chill is in your bonemarrow.

_How long do they have left?_

A tool is only worth keeping as long as it is useful. His weapon was useful, but ill-protected. The concept is proven, so all it needs is someone more capable to take his place at the trigger.

_Is Kylo the only reason he is still alive? Does he even know?_

He isn’t sleeping. Or - something not quite sleep descends, when his over-wrought body hits the cot at night.

_I have failed, I have failed, I have failed._

It is only a matter of time.

But he’s learning.

Not from the Empire, but from his own mistakes.

 _Build in the safeguards. Triple-check everything. Make it all sound_.

He only hopes he’s adapting fast enough. The Knight in his bed barely moves. But without him, Hux isn’t sure he’d have the strength to do what he needs to. 

Life… life without him…

He’s no longer sure it’s worth it.

_Be our shield. I will be our weapon._

Soon. He must act. Soon.


End file.
